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alright, I have to admit at this point, life is becoming creepy....I am kind of exhausted, frustrated and above all, tired of pretending. Tired of everything. And don't know what to do.....from the outside, it looks so good...everything is so perfect...but really, I am dying.....it's so horrible inside....can't figure out what should I be doing right now....i think i need a break...break from everything...